Whiskey Tango Foxtrot

I just want to know how far you get into this article before you puke into your mouth.

Do you doubt we need more saints?

What will it take?

The interesting thing is that I imagine the reaction to this will be Christians and Catholics condemning others. In the meantime, we ignore the logs in our own eyes.

What have you done today that was profoundly pro-human life?

The Single Best Seminarian Post Ever

The Sci Fi Catholic: Deej to Seminary, Part 2

This is the funniest thing I have read from a guy going into the seminary ever. In my life. You need to copy this to everyone you know on the planet. I'm not joking. Hat tip - Mark Shea.

Goodness, look at all those new readers. I appear to have been Mark-Sheaed, which is, I suppose, the Catholic equivalent of being Penny-Arcaded. Mark, you can link my blog anytime you want.

Guess I better put up some real content to keep them coming back. Hmm...okay, tune in tomorrow and we'll have a movie review DOUBLE FEATURE!

In the meantime, I must explain yesterday's post at more length. Yes, I am going to seminary to study for the priesthood, and some of you will, no doubt, want to know why. I list my reasons here:

1. Power. Over you, specifically. One aspect of the priesthood has a particular appeal to me, and that's the ability to exert control over superstitious parishioners via their deceased loved ones. If you don't do what I say, or give me sufficient money, I'll have the ability to cast your dead relatives from purgatory into hell. Think about that for a minute and then tell me who wouldn't want to be a priest.


2. Wealth. Speaking of sufficient money, we all know the Vatican has gigantic vats full of it, so much that if the Church only opened her greedy coffers, she could instantly solve all the world's problems with her enormous monetary assets and still have enough left over to fund an ill-fated space program involving flying cathedrals and confused nuns. Fortunately, she's not going to do that, because every good bishop knows money was made for swimming in, Scrooge McDuck style. As a mere priest I won't have a big vat of moolah like the pope, but I'm sure I can acquire a small bathtub full, which is sufficient for my modest needs.


3. Influence. As a priest, I might be able to speed up the process of the canonization of Isaac Leibowitz. I mean, let's get this show on the road here. What's taking so long?
   


4. Secrets. If I manage to acquire enough power and influence through the regular channels of backstabbing and simony, I might gain access to the secret vaults where we keep the fifty-four other, more accurate gospels, and I might even learn the truth about our architecture, about the aliens, and about the vampires. I might see all the artifacts that the Church somehow managed to nick from the Temple of Solomon, which will be particularly special to me as an archaeologist. And since nicking artifacts from the Temple of Solomon would require the Church to have a time machine, I might get to see a time machine. That's pretty sweet.


5. Style. I have never yet seen a priest with enough guts to wear a leather trenchcoat and dark sunglasses with his clerical garb, and somebody needs to do something about that.
   


6. Praying Directly to Jesus. We let the ordinary folk like you pray to saints, of course, or go through the mediation of a priest and his esoteric, intentionally obscure rituals in another language, and sometimes we even let you pray to Jesus' Sacred Heart (though that's pushing it, so don't do it too often), but only the ordained get to talk to Jesus himself. If I'm ordained a priest, you'll have to go through me to get to Jesus, and that gives me a certain feel-good rush (see no. 1 above).
   


7. Assassination. Let's face it, assassins are cool, and priest assassins are extra cool. Admittedly, I jumped the gun on this one; I was so excited about my future carrying out brutal murders to perpetuate the lies of Holy Mother Church, I went and shot a museum curator who was studying Leonardo Da Vinci a little too closely. I then followed this up by taking out a couple of kids who appeared to be about to commit the vile act of eating fruit in the forest together (an act that can change the multiverse!). Afterward, my pastor had to take me aside and inform me that, though assassination is indeed an important part of ministry, it can only be carried out by those who have done penance for murder ahead of time. I asked if that meant I was in some kind of trouble, but he reassured me that I could take care of it with an indulgence if I shelled out some cash for a new cathedral. In the end, my first assassinations were expensive, but worth it.


8. Great Retirement Benefits. At the end of my life, after I have gained dizzying power through my clever maneuvering in the corrupt hierarchy of Rome, and after my flesh has been engrossened by gluttony, drunkenness, and sexual excess (made all the more grotesque by unrelieved celibacy, which, by the way, causes hallucinations), I will lie on my deathbed suffering from fever and dropsy. I will have an excruciating itch over my whole body, as well as difficulty breathing. I will have extremely foul breath. Then, in my last moments, I will see a vision of raging fire--a premonition of my eternal fate--and at last my body will burst open with worms, a devastating symbol of heavenly displeasure. I'm really looking forward to it.

Recovery

Today I am recovering from home from the kidney donation and I want to thank everyone who donated money and/or prayers.

I was overwhelmed in a number of ways and I can't thank you enough.

I apologize for not writing for the last few days. I thought that after a week I would be up for resuming my schedule of writing every day the way that I had been doing before the surgery.

I was wrong.

One of the things that has surprised me is how tired I am. It is as if I cannot get enough sleep, even when I have been on a sleep schedule of 12 hours a day and napping two hours every afternoon. I am constantly yawning and my energy level is much lower than I ever thought it would be. It is getting better every day, and this morning I found that I really wanted to do this writing, so I don't anticipate the fatigue keeping me from writing every day for much longer.

It has been frustrating that I can't lift anything for the next month. I am very used to being pretty active around the house and when I can't lift my daughter or lift a load of laundry, I start to feel useless and get frustrated. My eternally patient wife has been a trooper, taking on every manual chore around the house, even weeding all the flower beds yesterday and bringing out the trash. These are distinctly things that I would do, but can't right now.

Combining all of these elements together, and I have been focusing on a lot less than I did before the surgery. I am spending time with the girls and trying to enjoy them as much as possible. I read two or three books that had nothing to do with theology, a sports book and a couple of spy novels. Besides that, I haven't answered many emails, and truthfully almost missed my interview with Real Life Radio today!

I am looking forward to getting back into the swing of things a little bit at a time.

I have two important writing projects due that I am going to concentrate on this month, then as August begins I am going to reboot the Sainthood Challenge. In the meantime, I'll be praying for you, and I truly hope that your pursuit of sainthood is full of Grace, Challenge, and Prayer!

By the way, while I was in surgery Farah Fawcett and Michael Jackson died. I consider this a significant sign that I need to get back on my feet soon before the world comes crashing down.

Best of S and S: Now Everything Changes

I am posting a "Best of Sainthood and Surrender" this week as I recover from surgery. Thanks for stopping by! My prayers are with you.

This was originally posted on May 13, 2009, about a week after I learned I would not be returning to Kellenberg to teach at the end of the year.

Now Everything Changes

There have been some major changes in my life in the last five days. It has caused a good deal of emotions and to be honest, it has run the gamut.

I will be leaving Kellenberg High School at the end of this year to pursue other areas of ministry.

The last four years at Kellenberg has been incredible for me. I have learned an amazing amount about myself from the students as they responded, didn't respond, or rejected what I have taught.

Working with the Scripture course caused me to rethink the way that I looked at Scripture and when I first started teaching in 2005, I had no idea that I would be presenting the Bible Timeline project to the entire school or even teaching others how to teach from it around the country.

The junior morality course has really caused me to explore different areas of Catholic thought and basic philosophy. I have stared into the pit of moral relativism on the face of a 17 year-old and it causes me to fear for the future. I have heard Grace-given wisdom from the mouths of 16 year-olds and been filled with hope.

I think the one event that has caused me to grow the most is leading eXaLT. This weekly meeting of students which sometimes numbered over 200 was a voluntary moment to come together to worship in song, to pray, and to adore Christ in the Blessed Sacrament. I don't think that things can be the same for me after witnessing the way students have learned to simply surrender to God. I have never worked with a group of musicians under the age of 18 who understand that leading worship is not a performance, and that each of their skills are simply part of the whole experience of adoration.

There are other things that I participated in that I will never forget. Small groups of students that I met with over the course of four years who showed me what it meant to be a high school student with courage. To love under incredibly tough circumstances. To laugh in the midst of it all.

My heart was in leading the annual trip of Juniors to the Life Teen Leadership Conference the first week of every July. In the last eight years, this conference has become one of my favorite. The students and teens and ministers that are there are truly an inspiration and gift from God. If any of those students from groups that I led ever knew how much I received spiritually from that week, they would understand that they were leading me.

What next?

The first thing that is going to change is the web site. I have bought the rights to and will start publishing the site under www.sainthoodandsurrender.com. I think the world needs more saints. I think the world needs more people who are willing to stand up and say that they desire sainthood in today's world. That means that they are going to choose sainthood in everything that they do.

Their jobs.

Their hobbies.

Their families.

They can be Catholic, but they don't have to be. The only requirement is that they desire sainthood. Everything else is secondary. When that first thing is introduced in your life, then everything will fall into place. Everything will make sense. What is a priority when it comes to this decision or that decision? Choose sainthood and the way becomes clear.

The first thing I would like to do (and this reflects Seth's talk below) is announce The Sainthood Project. TSP is simple. Gather 1000 people who want to be saints. Period.

1000 people who desire to give their lives completely to God so that God can do what He will.

1000 people that will be open to vocations if God asks.

1000 people that will be open to doing mission work if God asks.

1000 people that are going to care more about others than themselves.

1000 people that are going to pray as if their lives depended on it... because they do.

1000 people that are going to give a witness to the joy that is in them.

1000 people that are going to allow the Grace of God to completely disrupt their lives, make them dangerous to the world, open them to persecution, but be willing to stand up for the truth in complete love.

1000 people that are going to change the culture by living counter-culturally.

1000 people that are going to reflect each and every day on how God is working in their lives. On how God is calling them deeper into a relationship of love. Simple, pure, beautiful, good, true love.

This is not a political party. God is bigger than that.

This is not some marketing scheme. You don't have to pay a thing.

This is not a new church. Jesus already gave us one.

This is not a T-shirt, a bumper sticker, a slogan, or a television show. You can't market the human heart.

This is not easy. Watch Gibson's film for an idea of what sainthood requires.

For now, spread the word.

Pray. What is God calling you to? Is God calling you to be a saint? If not, what the hell are you going to do with eternal life?

Best of S and S: Awww Hell

I am posting a "Best of Sainthood and Surrender" this week as I recover from surgery. Thanks for stopping by! My prayers are with you.

This was originally posted on February 25, 2008 and deals with visions of hell. I don't know if you figured this out, but I just think we don't talk about hell enough.

Aw Hell...

There are three visions of Hell that stand out for me in film. All of them I saw with no intention of catching on to a vision of Hell, but it just seemed to occur.

1. “300” - This isn’t caught by most people, but I refer to the scene that takes place in Xerxes’ Throne Tent when the hunchback comes to him with news about how to defeat the Spartans. In the Throne Tent, every temptation is offered to the hunchback. He is offered pleasures, money, and power. None of this was offered by Leonides, the king of the Spartans. Leonides only required that he serve in a way that best fit the entire army. Due to his hunch, he could not stand on the front line, so he refused to join them. One thing that struck me was that even though everyone in the tent was engaged in seeking pleasure, they could not really achieve a permanent happiness and they became uglier and uglier the deeper into the tent you went. It seems to me that sin offers eternal happiness and gives temporary pleasure, but in the end we live in fear, disfigured and scarred.
   
2. “Event Horizon” - I saw this movie by accident one night on HBO. I do not recommend it to anyone. It is disturbingly graphic beyond imagination. I have watch some gross movies in my day, but the images in this film were terrible. They were even edited to avoid the NC-17 rating. The idea of people being so deranged that they sought pleasure in any way possible, but that pleasure only brought about the pain of the people around them was probably the most graphic depiction of what I can only describe as disturbing beyond belief. There is a quote from the movie that makes Hell sear itself on my brain in a way I will never forget. The doctor in the movie says, “Hell is just a word. The reality is much, much worse.” If this film is any indication, then he is completely right.
   
3. “Pinocchio” - Yes, you read that right. The Disney movie, too. Not the guy from “Life is Beautiful.” In the movie, all the boys get kidnapped and go to “Pleasure Island” where they can do anything that they want with no real consequences. On Pleasure Island they turn into jackasses and are sold into bondage forever. Just when we think we have attained Heaven, we realize that we are really making ourselves into slaves and all the pleasure we think that we have grasped is completely false.

When I was at Disneyworld this last weekend, the family and I went to Downtown Disney, which is kind of the type of place where you go when you don’t want to spend money on an admission ticket, but you want to walk around a Disney area and see the shops.

There is one segment of the area known as “Pleasure Island” which is full of nightclubs and dance houses. I found it interesting that the tag line for this area was “It’s all about you. Unless it’s all about me.”

So essentially we have an area of Orlando Florida where people can go and make jack-asses of themselves.

A place where it can be all about what you want unless it is all about what the other person wants, which is all the time. Talk about frustrating! It is never really about you, but it is really about you. Here we have the greatest lie that Satan tries to thrust onto us. A lie that we cannot run away from.

Any time we try to create a Heaven on Earth we end up creating a Hell for ourselves that we find harder and harder to escape. A Hell that turns us into slaves. Slaves to addiction, fear, and slaves to a false reality.

You see, Heaven is completely about a sense of gift. Giving of yourself even when it hurts. That is never popular. However the idea of getting, taking, and receiving pleasure is always popular.

Herein lies the problem. How do you receive when everyone is taking? When everyone is making a jackass out of themselves, it is impossible to have love, to receive love, for there is no love being given.

When love is defined merely as getting pleasure, we find ourselves a slave to an ideal we will never find. When we choose to give, we find that there is more than enough to live on. We no longer have to grab, we no longer have to take.

It is through the gift that we find freedom. It is through the gift that we find Heaven. It is through the gift that we find true happiness and true love.

Best of S and S: Boromir vs. Faramir

I am posting a "Best of Sainthood and Surrender" this week as I recover from surgery. Thanks for stopping by! My prayers are with you.

This was originally posted on March 10, 2009. It deals with sin and Lord of the Rings. That makes it an automatic entry.

"Boromir vs. Faramir"

Sinful behavior can be justified in our minds by a number of things, even if those justifications are completely wrong. There are times when we think that it would be better to have the experience (fill in experience here) than go without, even if we know that the experience is wrong.

We are flirting with spiritual death.

I call this the Boromir vs. Faramir effect. In the book “The Lord of the Rings” Boromir feels that he can take the One Ring and utilize it to save his people from the armies of Mordor. This temptation proves to be overwhelming for him. I sympathize. How many times have I felt that by doing a little bit of evil I am able to achieve some type of good.

I might even have convinced myself that God smiled on the rebellious behavior. In the end, however, it is just sin. Hollow and empty on the inside and beautiful on the outside. A complete deception to flirt with powers that I have no ability to wrestle with on my own.

Faramir is different in the book. He is not tempted by the One Ring and simply seeks the knowledge needed in order to do good. He has no need to “experience” utilizing the power in the Ring as a weapon against his enemies. He even tells Frodo that if the Ring were lying by the side of the road he would not take it.

It is a matter of perspective. Are we able to see evil for what it is? Are we able to see temptations in our lives for what they are? If it were always clear, then they certainly wouldn’t be called temptations because they would not be tempting! That is the allure of sin. It seems to help us, to benefit us in the short term and we cannot see the long term consequences. We fancy ourselves as stronger than what the pull of the temptation is. We will not sink to addiction to sin. We are much better than that.

Our justifications prove that we have started down the road to addiction already. We wrestle with what to do, fighting the desire to engage in “x” action. How is this unlike an addict? Should we not be free to simply make the choice to do what is good, knowing that in the long run it will be far better for us? Only if we are free as Faramir.

It is Boromir that is a slave. A slave to his own pride. A slave to his temptations for glory and power and victory. It is Faramir that recognizes the humility and sacrifice that is needed to defeat evil.

Our justifications for sin are simply pride disguised. We think that we are special, that somehow the rules that have governed souls for all time do not apply to us for we are stronger. We have the power ourselves to defeat even sin if it were to take hold in us.

Good Friday is coming and we need to consider that even God himself allowed sin to “defeat” him. To maul him. To kill him.

That it was much better to allow evil to defeat itself than to allow evil to defeat our freedom, our free will, our Faramir.

For victory does not come through our own strength, through our own “force of arms”. It comes from Jesus Christ.

May we continue to surrender to Him and Him alone and reject our temptation.

Best of S and S: Etiquette in Traffic

I am posting a "Best of Sainthood and Surrender" this week as I recover from surgery. Thanks for stopping by! My prayers are with you.

This was originally posted on April 10, 2008 and deals with my hatred of traffic.

Etiquette in Traffic

I need to put my foot down. Figuratively. Because I put my foot down on the brake too often in traffic.

My commute to work can vary from 20 minutes to one hour depending on the prevailing winds and moods of the traffic of the day. There are a few things that I believe could make everyone’s commutes a lot easier if we followed “Todd’s Laws of Traffic.” As follows:

1. No Make-Up - I love looking in the rear-view mirror and seeing someone who is trying to perform minor plastic surgery on their face to make themselves look better while they are driving. I have seen women and men applying make-up in traffic. Eye make-up. Such as they cannot see because they have a brush or pencil in their eye. Inevitably this ends with the person rear-ending someone and stabbing themselves with an eyeliner pencil. Suddenly we have more traffic. By the way, this includes clipping your toe nails, picking your nose, preparing meals, and anything else that might distract you from driving.
2. No Vanity Plates - If I have to spend time in traffic trying to figure out that “IHRTMCH” means “I love my chihuahua” then there is a high chance that someone else is going to be concentrating on your plate so much that they are going to rear end you and your dog. To be honest, I want to go to work. I don’t want to read political statements or team affiliations on your car. That goes for bumper stickers as well.
3. Bass - At what point did it become all the rage to play music at such a volume that my heart skips a beat causing arrhythmia? You know you have a problem with your hearing when you have to install a bass tube under the back seat of your car so that your passengers’ fat vibrates off their body during the car ride. No music should be played that loud. Ever. I used to live in California so I have flashbacks to earthquakes and I start looking for holes in the road like what happened to Lois Lane in the original “Superman” with Christopher Reeves. That movie ruled.
4. Eye Contact - If you are driving and you need to cut in front of me to get into my lane, that is fine. You better make eye contact with me when you do so. Just as a general acknowledgment of me as a human being. Your eyes can say, “Hey, can I get in there?” and I will simply nod and say “ok!” I hate when I need to get into a lane and I try to get a driver’s attention and they deliberately ignore me as if not looking at me will cause me to cease existing. Or if you shove your car in to my lane and stop looking at me in case I am angry. Well, I wasn’t angry before, but since you refuse to acknowledge me as a human person, I am going to run you off the road.
5. Blinkers - This is the easiest tool on the planet. You flip it in the direction you are going and everyone around you knows what you are doing so that you don’t have to worry about point 4. I think people should have blinkers on their backs so that when they are walking in places like the mall I’ll know if they suddenly have to dive in front of me to grab a Cinnabon on the way to Macy’s to pick up another pair of Jordache jeans.
6. Overly Safe Following Distance - I understand the need to not stop short and rear-end someone, but can we stop with the 100-yard distance? If your brake foot doesn’t operate that fast then you need to stop driving forever. I feel bad for jean companies from the 80’s. It wasn’t their fault that acid wash and the tapered ankle went out of style. We just couldn’t watch the New Kids grow up without some type of ramifications.
7. Stinky Cars - Change your oil. It isn’t that the New Kids were a bad group, I mean, I had the right stuff. We just didn’t want to see them grow up and become jaded. Donnie tried to grow up and be a dramatic actor but all I kept seeing was him doing the dance. At least Menudo kept the band young for years.
8. Jesus Fish - I’m down with Jesus, but if you have the fish on the car, that means you think you are going to Heaven. In which case, I would rather avoid you because you don’t care if you die. I think the Cinnabon was the best mall invention ever. You really can’t go wrong with one of those and they didn’t expand too fast like Krispy Kreme did. That killed a lot of the demand. The same thing happened to Planet Hollywood.
9. Singing to Yourself - You are not Celine. When I worked at Planet Hollywood, I was the best waiter in the world. I would spend my time protecting celebrities and serving things like the “Bruce Willis Burger” with extra shrimp. I would actually sell people grilled shrimp on their burger. I ruled.
10. Text Messaging - I saw this the other day and almost gave birth I was so taken aback. How in the world do you text and drive at the same time? I can’t even text and think at the same time. They are literally two different activities.............. I just paused to text myself. That takes real effort. A lot more effort than driving well, that is for sure.

In our spiritual lives we can become unfocused as well. We let our selves drift and we lose focus on what is important. Instead of concentrating on getting to our destination, we concentrate on doing other things, not realizing that we are not driving very well. If we were serious about getting to our destination, we would put our foot on the gas and focus. Follow the map, get on the road, do what you have to do. Get to Heaven.

Best of S and S: To Whom it May Concern

I am posting a "Best of Sainthood and Surrender" this week as I recover from surgery. Thanks for stopping by! My prayers are with you.

This was originally posted on September 9, 2008 and got me in a lot of trouble when it was reprinted on The Catholic Exchange. I think it is worth a reprint since I was told to stop blogging as a result.

To Whom it May Concern

I am writing this letter in response to your reaction to my lecture regarding demons, sainthood, and spiritual warfare based on Peter Kreeft’s lecture from 1999 on the “Culture Wars” that had a profound impact on me when I heard it. I would like to thank you for your reaction in this matter and please understand that I hold you in the highest regard.

I apologize if my lecture in any way cost you any amount of discomfort. I understand that you do not take religion class or study God to feel uncomfortable and I certainly would not want to propagate any amount of uncomfortable feelings on your part. In fact, I have just recently decided to make a request to the administration to have air conditioning installed in all of my classrooms so as to make everybody more comfortable. I am also installing pillows for all the seats and a laptop at every desk. I am also doing away with all homework so that my students will simply have to color clever little pictures of Jesus holding children, Jesus laughing, and Jesus having a good old time on the boat with those fishermen. I am also removing all of those nasty crucifixes. Who wants to be reminded of a bloody, sacrificial Christ when we can have “feel good Jesus”?

I would like to respond to the comment that I do not know what I’m talking about when it comes to the idea of God, angels, demons, and good and evil. I understand that you take other classes where your teachers tell you all sorts of things: that 2 + 2 equals four, the Declaration of Independence was signed in 1776, that the element hydrogen is the first element on the Periodic Table of Elements. I understand that those teachers are authorities in their field and if they tell you something you believe it because... because... they are teaching it. I mean, they learned it from an authority who learned it from an authority all the way back until someone actually witnessed the event or wrote something down about it. Why would you not believe them?

I certainly would not expect you to apply the same standard to religion. God only knows the things that I could make up, teaching class as an authority. I might mention the fact that there are angels and demons that are fighting for our souls at this very moment and our every action, our every behavior determines which side of the war we are on. But what do I know? I’m not an authority like those other teachers. I certainly cannot trace my information from authority to authority to someone who has actually seen an event, met a person, or written down a personal experience.

Be careful, because I am now going to blow the lid off the entire Catholic faith.

I have access to numerous secret documents that only the most privileged can read. They contain only information that I know, and I wouldn’t expect you to be able to get a hold of these documents that might let you into the secret world that I have described in my class. I am therefore going to list the secret documents for you so that if you ever are able to get ahold of one of these precious tools, you might be able to read what someone who actually knows what they are talking about has written down since you seem to think that I have given my life to teaching something that am pulling out of my assumptions. This way you don’t have to rely on a silly classroom “authority.” (This is like getting your hands on Thomas Jefferson’s personal diary.)

There is a hidden document called the Gospel of Luke where demons are mentioned 17 times. The person who talks about these demons is a little known man by the name of Jesus Christ who seems to speak with some authority on the matter, being as he claims to be God.

Another “gospel” is written by a man by the name of Mark. Interestingly, he only mentions demons 11 times but his gospel is the shortest and is also about this “Jesus” character. Again, he claims to be God and have some authority, but until he rises from the dead, who’s to say?

There is also two other “gospels”, the book of Baruch, the book of Revelation, the book of Psalms, the book of Deuteronomy, the letter of James, and two letters by Paul. These have been cleverly hidden in a little volume I like to refer to as the Bible.

I would not expect you to be able to look up the term “demons” in the Catechism of the Catholic church and refer to the 12 instances of the word in the following paragraphs: 2113, 2116, 2117, 548, 550, 1506, 1507, 1673, 598, 700, 447, 574, 414, and 391. There is also the glossary that defines demons as: “a fallen angel, who sinned against God by refusing to accept his reign. Satan or the devil, the evil one, and the other demons were at first good angels, created naturally good, who became evil by their own doing.”

Of course there is the apparition of Mary at Fatima where she showed the visionaries hell itself. They wrote that the vision itself, lasting only but a second was enough to have killed them except that they had been promised protection by the Blessed Mother and were promised a vision of heaven. Lucy, the last of the living visionaries died in 2005 at the age of 97. Certainly she is too ancient an authority to even be credible. She might even have been a myth.

This is all assuming of course that you believe in the devil. I understand it is popular now to simply say that the afterlife is “whatever you believe it is.” The stupidity of this statement is absolutely beyond my reckoning. Human beings can no more control the afterlife than we can control the current life and since the afterworld was designed by the same being who designed the current world, I can only imagine that the lie of the afterlife being whatever we imagine it to be is simply one of the most brilliant ploys the devil has ever come up with to keep himself hidden, working behind the curtains. “The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn’t exist.” -- The Usual Suspects.

Again, I apologize for taking the blindfolds off and exposing you to a light that is obviously too bright, too soon. I would have liked to remain in the world of candy canes, gum drops, and giant pink hearts that say “I’m a nice person!” but you are practically an adult and I must refer to

1 Corinthians 9:16 - “woe to me if I do not preach the gospel!”

To be perfectly honest, I care too much about my own soul to try to avoid offending your sensitive nature.

2 Timothy 2:24 - “And the Lord's servant must not be quarrelsome but kindly to every one, an apt teacher, forbearing, correcting his opponents with gentleness. God may perhaps grant that they will repent and come to know the truth, and they may escape from the snare of the devil, after being captured by him to do his will.”

For, as Peter says in 1 Peter 5:8-9 - “ Be sober, be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking some one to devour. Resist him, firm in your faith...”

But what do Mary, Jesus, Luke, Mark, Peter and Paul know? They are just the authorities.

Best of S and S: Sainthood

I am posting a "Best of Sainthood and Surrender" this week as I recover from surgery. Thanks for stopping by! My prayers are with you.

This was originally posted on September 4, 2008 and shows a definitive transition from my earlier posts to how I decided to live my life in the last year.

Sainthood

I have had something interesting occur in me in the last month. Bear with me because if you have thought to yourself: “Todd is acting kind of weird... “

Well... that might be normal.

It occurred to me at the end of July that I had been settling for second rate. Second rate in my family, second rate in my job, second rate from myself, and second rate from my God.

And that does not rate.

I started thinking in the beginning of August about how much time I wasted in a given day on (forgive me) total bullshit.

I would check my email every 10-15 minutes to see if there was something I needed to answer.

I would check my cell phone every 10-15 minutes to see if anyone had called.

I would browse websites so I could be "in the know" about anything and everything.

I would spend time listening to talks, reading books, reading the internet, watching TV, and doing anything possible to "improve my ability to do ministry, to be a better speaker, teacher, writer, campus minister, musician, husband, father, worker, gardener, homeowner, son, brother, uncle, entertainer, comedian, Catholic... blah, blah, blah..." (notice the priorities in that list)

I hereby apologize to you for all of that and more.

I don't know what changed, but I think that God worked on me in ways I would never have imagined.

1. My wife, my girls. I have missed too much time with them to try to provide them with things that matter less then my presence. When my own family starts to come apart at the seams because the laptop gets opened or the phone starts to ring, then I need to readjust my priorities. The best time I had this summer was going to the beach with the family. Going to the amusement parks and holding my daughter as we went on a roller coaster for kiddies or a water slide. Tickling the baby. Sitting on the couch and talking to my wife and praying with my her. There is no work in the world that I do that is worth sacrificing that.
2. The anniversary of Humanae Vitae. I was proud of the conference that Fr. Joe Fitzgerald hosted at St. Killian's and in the process I tried to make it something that it wasn't. In my final speaking engagement of the summer I was reminded that the truth mattered more than my jokes, that Christ is more important than my stories, and that prayer is more important than anything I had to say.
3. My wife’s grandmother passed away. This was a difficult two weeks because it simply reminded me how selfish I was. I continually had to die to my idea of what I should be doing and what God wanted to do with me. It also reminded me that the human family of Christ is beautifully broken, yearning for God, desperate to meet him and terrified of the prospect.
4. My father's heart attack. I treat myself terribly. Physically I have not exercised in over five years and I eat as if grease is stock in Exxon. God knows how much time I have left, but I need to give myself the self-discipline I tell everyone else to have.

What is the result? How have I changed? What do I see? What do I need to continue to work on?

The difference is that only one thing matters to me now: sainthood.

You read that right: I care about becoming a saint. Nothing more, nothing less.

This means that God gets 100% of my heart with 100% of my heart 100% of the time. (Thanks P. Kreeft) Period. Strike three. Game. Set. Match.

So forgive me if I am only checking my email once a day or less. Forgive me if I let the phone go to voicemail. Forgive me if I stopped watching the news, sports, reading articles, books, and every bit of drivel I can get my hands on. Forgive me if I don't know anything about the latest celebrities, movies, TV shows, politics, or sports events. Forgive me if I am not the guy who knows everything.

I'm not.

I never was.

I pretended I was.

I was lying. I was a fool

Forgive me for lying. I am still a fool.

If I am at home, I am with my family and I am pursuing sainthood with them.

If I am at Kellenberg then I am teaching and am pursuing sainthood with my students and coworkers.

If I am doing campus ministry then I am pursuing sainthood at the college.

If I am writing I am trying to discern what God wants me to write and get it on paper so that I can be a saint and journey to heaven with others.

I literally don't want anything else.

I want to be holy and I want to be a saint and I want to push, pull, drag, kick, punch as many people toward sainthood as possible, but especially my family.

I don't care what you think of that, or me, as long as you get closer to Christ.

I don't care if my students think I am crazy or if my coworkers are angry that I didn't teach exactly what was in the curriculum or if I didn't do that paperwork exactly by the handbook, as long as they realize that I am about the business of enabling more people but especially my students to become saints.

I don't care if I do less speaking engagements or if I don't write another book as long as people know that they need to be saints.

I don't care if I am the worst musician on the planet as long as people worship like saints.

I care about being a saint.

I care about you being a saint.

That is scary. It is easy to hide behind technology and busy work and schedules and to-do lists and ideas and planning and debates and current events and never confront the fact that the reason we are not saints is that we don't want to be. Once again, Dr. Kreeft offers the statement that nails my soul to the wall and convicts me in my own sin.

I'm not afraid, I am not stopping, I am not giving up, and I give it all to Christ.

Make me a saint.

Everything else can wait.

I was prompted to write this by reading the quote below that is now on the front of the website after I had given my personal rendition of Peter Kreeft's "Culture Wars" talk found on his website to my students during the first two days of classes. I just seemed like this entire summer finally made sense and I wanted to write it down and offer it. It is probably the most vulnerable post I have ever made. I realize that I have opened the door that cannot be shut.

"If you will look into your own heart in complete honesty, you must admit that there is one and only one reason why you are not a saint: you do not wholly want to be." - William Law

Sometimes sinners need to come out and tell the world that they are sick of sitting in the mud and muck. I’m not clean yet. I am in the process of growing.

Jeremiah 20:7-9

Mark 10:17-30

Ephesians

“I say to you, this morning, that if you have never found something so dear and precious to you that you will die for it, then you aren’t fit to live.

You may be 38 years old, as I happen to be, and one day, some great opportunity stands before you and calls upon you to stand for some great principle, some great issue, some great cause. And you refuse to do it because you are afraid.

You refuse to do it because you want to live longer. You’re afraid that you will lose your job, or you are afraid that you will be criticized or that you will lose your popularity, or you’re afraid that somebody will stab or shoot or bomb your house. So you refuse to take a stand.

Well, you may go on and live until you are ninety, but you are just as dead at 38 as you would be at ninety.

And the cessation of breathing in your life is but the belated announcement of an earlier death of the spirit.

You died when you refused to stand up for right.

You died when you refused to stand up for truth.

You died when you refused to stand up for justice.”

-Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

Sainthood Sunday: St. Luke

The "Beloved Physician" and author of one of the gospels, I felt it was appropriate to talk about him today, given my exerience of the past three days.

I had written an entire blog entry that I just deleted as completely inadequate to describe what I have been through in the last three days.

There has been pain.

There has been suffering.

There has also been great joy.

There has also been life.

The surgery went better than anyone had hoped. The kidney was perfect for a transplant and has been functioning at the highest level. It actually started working the instant they connected it to my brother's artery. He was out of ICU within a day. I was able to leave the hospital after two nights and he will leave after four nights. It could not have gone better. Some at the hospital are pleasantly surprised. I am not, given the number of prayers and messages about prayer I received.

I think that calls for me to reflect on the gift that is modern medicine. It is so important for us to use the gifts that God has given to their fullest.

That is why we are able to do things like kidney donation.

That is why we are able to perform surgeries to remove cancers.

There is so much more we can do.

If you have a gift for helping others, or you are considering a career in medicine, recognize that God has given you that gift for a reason, and we need saints who are doctors and nurses.

To everyone involved in my brother's transplant, thank you for using the gifts that God gave you to the best of your ability.

Thank you God for allowing me to donate my kidney to my brother so that he can enjoy life without the drawbacks of kidney failure. Please allow him to make a swift and full recovery.

Thank you to everyone for your prayers, masses, donations, and well-wishes. Each and every single prayer made a world of difference and continues to.

In the coming week I am going to take a break from posting on the site so that I can recover. I am going to post some of the most popular articles from the last year.

Continue to choose sainthood, and know that I am praying for you!